


Memories

by sadspockpanda



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Gen, Grief/Mourning, Star Trek Into Darkness Spoilers, spock prime/nu!jim if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-18
Updated: 2013-07-18
Packaged: 2017-12-20 13:41:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/887923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadspockpanda/pseuds/sadspockpanda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim was surprised by his lack of surprise when he saw older Spock standing by the grave.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Memories

**Author's Note:**

> Spock Prime's potential reaction to Pike's death in STiD was something I couldn't get out of my head and it eventually turned into Jim and Spock Prime grieving together. Not beta'd so let me know if you spot any errors.

Bones would probably yell at him for getting out of bed so soon on his own, but Jim didn't care. He had to get out of that hospital room. Why he came here, he wasn't sure. Maybe he had wanted to tell the old man that he couldn't join him just yet.

Jim was surprised by his lack of surprise when he saw older Spock standing by the grave. He had seen flashes of a different Pike in his memories during the meld back on Delta Vega- just like how he had seen Spock die to save the ship, how he had seen the man he could have been... Jim shook his head and hobbled the rest of the way to the grave. He was going to have to do some serious exercising to get the stiffness and atrophy out of his muscles. Bones said that he wasn't as bad off as he could have been, thanks to the so-called super-blood that was infused with his own blood. 

Jim bumped his shoulder against Spock's and took his place beside him. Spock looked at him, acknowledging his presence before returning his attention to the grave. The tombstone was small, simple, granite, with a holo of his picture that would display when Pike's name was spoken. But neither Jim or Spock wished to see it.

They stood in silence for minutes, maybe hours, Jim couldn't be sure, before he could take it no longer. “Was he a good man in your time line, Spock?”

“He was not a perfect person, nor a perfect Captain, but... yes. I believe good is suffice.” Spock spoke, his voice heavy with grief. “He... He was a mentor, in my time, perhaps a friend, though I did not see much of a reason to have human friends when I served with him.”

Jim nodded, shifting closer to the older Vulcan, until they were almost touching. “Tell me about him. A story. Something.”

“On my very first mission on the _Enterprise_ , we were sent to examine a top-secret research facility that was working on using wormholes to teleport instead of the current beaming technology. The tests they showed us seemed to make it work, but given the unstable nature of wormholes, Pike and I believed it to be too good to be true.” Spock had not thought of this in some time, not since his journey to put his Jim's body to rest. “And it was. The console fried out, causing a wormhole to randomly appear beneath me. 

I was sent to a far-point on the planet, on the edge of a cliff above an active volcano. I stumbled and almost fell to my death then, barely managing to grab hold of the unstable ledge. The ground crumbled beneath my grasp and I readied myself for death. But someone grabbed hold of me and I was surprised to see Captain Pike pulling me up to safety. I did not understand why the Captain would risk his life to save me. He had no way of knowing what would be on the other end of the wormhole, but it was a risk he took for me. It was in that moment that I knew I could trust him.”

“That sounds like something my Pike would have done as well.” Jim rested his head against Spock's shoulder, feeling the grief he'd held back during the manhunt wash over him anew. He could still hold it back, so long as he focused. “Tell me more, please.”

“It would be easier and less time-consuming to show you.” Spock offered, but Jim shook his head.

“I can't deal... The emotional transference. Don't think either of us could take it.”

“Of course.” Spock replied, and began to tell another tale. He continued with stories of his Pike for the better part of an hour until his voice began to crack with emotion. Jim took his hand in his own and squeezed it, and Spock was grateful for the contact, though he could not find his voice again to continue.

“He took a chance on me. Twice. Because he had faith in me.” Jim spoke up, his grip on Spock's hand tightening. “Do you know how many people had given up on me? He never did. He looked at a punk who'd just been in a bar fight and gave me the kick in the ass I needed to get my life back on track.”

The memory of Pike's body- blood around his mouth, pale, lifeless eyes, not moving, not breathing- popped into Jim's mind and he could not hold back the shudder that shot through his body.

“He told me... The day he died, he made me his first officer after the ship was taken from me, and he said everything would be all right. He called me son and he said everything would be...” It was like a dam broke inside and the grief he had been trying to hold back flooded out. He let go of Spock's hand and fell to his knees, vision blurred by tears. “Why him, Spock?”

Spock knelt by Jim, placing his freshly released hand on Jim's shoulder. “I cannot answer that, Jim, as I can find no logic in it myself.”

Jim turned, burying his face in Spock's robes, hiding his pain in the rough fabric. His muffled sobs seemed to be never ending. Spock enclosed him in a hug, with the kind of tenderness and understanding that Jim had never imagined Spock- or any Vulcan- could show. Between breaks in his crying, he managed to choke out the question “Why” several more times until he could talk or cry no more, just wheeze and grasp desperately at Spock, who, judging by the damp patch he felt seeping into his head, was crying as well.


End file.
